Some students want to transfer because they had a plan and it worked out, and some students transfer because they had a plan that did not work out. Achievements unlocked! Pulling this one off is a little trickier. First of all, because there may be a lot more emotions wrapped up in your decision to transfer than in the two examples mentioned above. Let me say this a little more boldly: 2. If your expectations were met, great!
Just outline your plan , then show how you rocked that plan—maybe even throw in something bonus that happened and I even did it while keeping a full-time job! But whether your expectations were met or not, you MUST give specifics to support your points.
We need proof! So in that example above the author first lets us know what she expected hands on! We have a great hands-on, experimental Culinary Arts program filled with food nerds!
You could: 3. Not until I moved miles away to X school did I realize that Y school—which had been in my backyard all along, just 20 minutes from the church I was baptized in, the grandmother who raised me, and the one I love most in this world dog my dog, Max —was home after all.
Got the idea? You can keep your desires a little vague here. Instead: how did you work to meet your needs? What did you do about it? It may have taken me longer to get here, and my path probably had a few more twists and turns in it than most, but every activity I begged my dad to let me do and every extracurricular club I joined complemented my course work and shaped who I am.
What makes this a good transfer essay? Try starting with a bold statement or some interesting dialogue to draw your readers in. Remember: admission staff read hundreds and sometimes thousands of essays, so yours needs to stand out. The writer gives transfer counselors a glimpse at what makes him unique with just the right amount of detail.
With a word limit, you need to be succinct. Often transfer students are asked to discuss what led them to changing schools. Like this student, you should address your reasons for transferring in a straightforward manner, without being defensive or negative. And you should address why you want to transfer into your college or colleges specifically, just like this student does.
He also ends his application essay with a strong statement that ties into earlier themes, bringing the essay full circle to a satisfying conclusion. And you can bet it was submitted well before the deadline! More and more my interests are becoming archaeological and historical.
When I visited Penn this fall, I was impressed by the breadth of offerings in anthropology and archaeology, and I absolutely loved your Museum of Archaeology and Anthropology. Your broad approach to the field with emphases on understanding both the past and present has great appeal to me.
By attending Penn, I hope to broaden and deepen my knowledge in anthropology, participate in more summer field work, volunteer at the museum, and eventually, go on to graduate school in archaeology. My reasons for transferring are almost entirely academic. I have made many good friends at Amherst, and I have studied with some wonderful professors. However, I do have one non-academic reason for being interested in Penn. I originally applied to Amherst because it was comfortable—I come from a small town in Wisconsin, and Amherst felt like home.
I'm now looking forward to pushing myself to experience places that aren't quite so familiar. The kibbutz at Kfar HaNassi was one such environment, and the urban environment of Philadelphia would be another.
As my transcript shows, I have done well at Amherst and I am convinced I can meet the academic challenges of Penn. I know I would grow at Penn, and your program in anthropology perfectly matches my academic interests and professional goals. Analysis of David's Transfer Essay Before we even get to David's essay, it's important to put his transfer into context. That said, he has many things going for him — he is coming from an equally demanding college where he has earned good grades, and he seems like the type of student who will certainly succeed at Penn.
Now on to the essay David is responding to the prompt on the Common Transfer Application: "Please provide a statement words minimum that addresses your reasons for transferring and the objectives you hope to achieve, and attach it to your application before submission. The Reasons for Transfer The strongest feature of David's essay is the focus. David is pleasingly specific in presenting his reasons for transferring.
David knows exactly what he wants to study, and he has a clear understanding of what both Penn and Amherst have to offer him. David's description of his experience in Israel defines the focus of his essay, and he then connects that experience to his reasons for wanting to transfer. Many transfer applicants are trying to move to a new college because they are running away from some kind of bad experience, sometimes something academic, sometimes something more personal.
David, however, clearly likes Amherst and is running towards something—an opportunity at Penn that better matches his newly discovered professional goals.
Got the idea? They read plenty of essays like that. Example 2: My dream is to become a special effects makeup artist with a specialty in fantasy-based creature makeup. In addition, the Professional Writing course will teach me how to write in a concise, straightforward style, a skill vital to a journalist. But whether your expectations were met or not, you MUST give specifics to support your points. I took classes ranging from applied sciences to ceramics, and—of course—I liked almost everything I tried!
Also, notice how his separate reasons can all be bullet pointed. Keep thinking. Then I took an anatomy and physiology course during the spring of my first year at ABC Community College, and it hit me.
I was intrigued by nearly every class I took, eager to dissect things in physiology or pick apart the ideas of Faulkner in American literature. Nevertheless, I loved every minute of my time in Israel. Some students want to transfer because they had a plan and it worked out, and some students transfer because they had a plan that did not work out. He does have a lot more space left to elaborate, but in this case the letter gets the job done well with few words. Show the admissions officers why you now have the skills and experience to make the right choice and join a school where you will thrive while making a meaningful contribution.
The Length The Common Transfer Application instructions state that the essay needs to be at least words. A lot. Instead, focus on aspects of the school that are more personal to you.